Aberdeenshire, Scotland-- Taking one step closer towards the potential for cloning the ultimate athlete, a group of Scottish researchers now claim to have cloned the perfect climber. By combining the DNA of a Rhesus monkey with that of a human. This reality has set off alarm bells in the European Community as legislators try to come to terms with the implications that the French may no longer be the best sport climbers. " />
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Climbing Is No Monkey Business


 

by Unknown

January 08, 2002

The first human-monkey Aberdeenshire, Scotland-- Taking one step closer towards the potential for cloning the ultimate athlete, a group of Scottish researchers now claim to have cloned the perfect climber. By combining the DNA of a Rhesus monkey with that of a human. This reality has set off alarm bells in the European Community as legislators try to come to terms with the implications that the French may no longer be the best sport climbers. Ian, the first successful attempt at human-monkey cloning is pictured at left where he feels most at home- on the monkey bars.

Taking one step back from the adult-cell cloning method used by Scottish researchers to clone a sheep, scientists at the Derbyshire Regional Primate Research Center cloned the human-monkey from early stage embryos using the nuclear transfer method. A set of chromosomes were removed from each of the eight cells in a primitive monkey embryo and then inserting into human egg cells from which the original DNA had been removed. These embryos were then implanted in the wombs of host mothers using in vitro fertilization techniques.

The patient, Ian, is now six years old and appear normal in every respect except that he periodically has fits where he throws his feces at innocent bystanders when he falls off a route. He is being raised by his "mother" and is expected to live as long as 24 years. This does not raise any alarms since most competition sport climbers are considered "washed up" by the age of 22. What does raise an alarm is just how did these Scottish researchers keep their secret for six long years.

The breakthrough could prove a major boon for equipment companies looking for the perfect athelete to sponsor. One problem many seem to have concern is having so many test groups of cloned human-monkeys would be that they would be more prone to temper tantrums than elite human sport climbers.

"What we want to do is establish an immortal cell line, something like an embryonic stem cell line, where you can produce literally unlimited numbers of these things,'' Doctor Wolf said.

Wolf and associates are now planning to continue their research and develop a line of human-monkey clones. However, they emphasize, they do not plan to clone monkeys from adult cells, and are opposed to the idea of cloning trad climbers.

News courtesy of Some Jackass with Too Much Time on His Hands.



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